Executive Gift Shoppe Posting Page

Monday, November 12, 2007

Weekly Contest Winner Week 2: WORST BIRTHDAY EVER

Congrulations to Kyle Taylor, our week 2 contest winner. Here's his hilarious story:

WORST BIRTHDAY EVER

When I was in the eighth grade, I became old enough for the first birthday when my parents really started to miss the boat on gift giving. Up until this point my parents did pretty well with gifts: a bike, basketball goal, etc… So this year I had no reason to believe the level of gift giving would be any less.



As was typical on birthdays, after everyone got home from school and work the five of us (my two sisters, parents, and I) gathered in the living room. Grandma had given presents to my parents and I started opening those first. To set the stage for this Grandma has always given terrible presents. Presents so dumb you just try to figure out how anyone could think this item could be a gift. This year was no different, but that was as expected. This year I started out with a toffee chocolate candy bar – highlight of all presents and given every year for Christmas and birthdays. Next, I opened up and old shoebox filled with packaging peanuts. As I tore through the box I found the first item, a roll of scotch tape. I gave the quizzical look I gave every year, and continued through the box hoping this year might be different than all the rest. Nope. Item number 2 was a roll of AVON chapstick, with a not attached that said, "Has the yearly calendar on it!" Oh how convenient! If I ever forget what day it is, I can just go to my trusty roll of chapstick, what a lifesaver! After finishing out the box with a standard sticker book, yes at the age of 14, I was still getting sticker books, I moved on to mom and dad's gifts.



Mom hands me the first bag, after opening grandma's gifts I was excited to get something worth opening. I tear it open, and stare. What is it? I COULDN'T EVEN FIGURE OUT WHAT IT WAS. All I could see is that they were black and ninja turtle green foam pads of some sort. I thought maybe they were masks at first, but I wasn't sure. So I turned back to mom and asked, "They're shin guards, for soccer" she replied. To give some background, I lived 6 miles outside a town of 2,000 people in rural Indiana. My school doesn't offer soccer, I've never played soccer, we didn't have cable thus I'd never even seen anyone play soccer on television. As I turned back to my gift something caught my eye, an orange sticker on the top left corner of the packaging. I focused in on it and read "CLEARANCE 75 CENTS." I was so mad and disappointed I just threw them down and left the room, not even opening the rest of my presents, which I got grounded for doing, on my birthday. After this birthday I either handpicked my birthday presents or got money, talk about a step in the right direction. My mother to this day, apologizes for buying such a terrible gift.

Labels: Birthday Gifts, Worst Birthday Ever

by: Executive Gift Shoppe